


Stars Fading But I Linger On, Dear

by laurynmakay



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Awkward Flirting, Bash is the captain of this ship, Domestic Bliss, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mutual Pining, Nightmares, Outright flouting of propriety, Sharing a Bed, brotherly teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25394545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurynmakay/pseuds/laurynmakay
Summary: While the Cuthberts are away for the weekend, Marilla insists that Anne cannot stay home alone and enlists Bash and Gilbert to stay with her.
Relationships: Gilbert Blythe/Anne Shirley
Comments: 24
Kudos: 379





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after Mary's death, but before the dance rehearsal or anything, in an alternate universe where Winnie doesn't exist.

“Marilla, it's only two days, I can stay here by myself.” Anne couldn't believe that not only were Matthew and Marilla leaving her behind, but they had also decided she needed a babysitter too! 

“Nonsense! What if you light the house on fire, or fall and break something, or get lost in the woods and no one notices you're missing.”

“I really don't see why they have to sleep over. Couldn't you just have Jerry check to see if I'm alive when he comes up in the mornings to do his chores?” 

“Certainly not, you require constant supervision.” Anne only grumbled in response. “Bash and Gilbert and little Dellie will be here in a few hours, in time for them to help with dinner.” 

“Is it absolutely necessary for all of them to come?” Anne mumbled, mostly to herself. 

“Gilbert is coming to watch over you and Bash is there as a chaperone.”

“Gilbert and I don't need a chaperone! All we do is fight and talk about school.” Marilla gave her a look she couldn't decipher. 

“It's two days, Anne, it'll go by quick enough.” Anne was still glaring at the floor. “Are you going to say goodbye? No? Alright.” Marilla started to turn away. 

“Wait!” She jumped into Marilla's arms, nearly knocking her over. “Promise me you'll have a safe journey? And you'll be home in time for supper Sunday night?”

“Yes, yes,” Marilla said dismissively, but she wrapped and up in her arms as well. When Anne finally let her go, Matthew stepped up from where he had been waiting silently on the other side of the porch and pressed a kiss to the top of Anne’s head. 

***

Anne was angrily chopping vegetables in the kitchen when they arrived, despite how much she wished they wouldn't show. Bash sauntered right in and sat at the table, setting Dellie’s basket in front of him while he made his greetings. Gilbert lingered in the doorway, almost nervously, hat in hand. The heat of the kitchen was in stark contrast to the cool, spring air outside. It had rained the day before and the sun had yet to reveal itself and warm the earth. Anne said a simple “Hello” and turned back to her cooking. 

“Anne, do you-- do you need a hand with anything?” She glared up at Gilbert. 

“No,” she snapped, louder than she intended. A few moments later when she almost dropped an entire bowl, he tried again.

“Are you really sure I can't be of any assistance.”

“No, I don't need any help and I certainly don't need you here.” She instantly felt bad for yelling at him. It wasn't Gilbert’s fault Marilla asked him to come. He genuinely did just want to help. She was just so frustrated. She wanted Marilla to be able to trust her. 

She resumed cooking silently, not able to look him in the eye. He made this way to the other end of the counter and just stood there watching her. If she had turned around, she would have seen the way his eyes followed every move her fingers made and the way she kept tossing her braids over her shoulder. She also would have seen Bash silently laughing to himself as he watched the helpless look grow on Gilbert's face. 

Minutes passed and Anne actually did find herself in need of some assistance, she couldn’t quite juggle everything at once. But she couldn't just admit defeat, not to Gilbert. So, she took the bowl she had been stirring and placed it in his hands without a word. She yanked her hand back to her chest when their fingers brushed. She tried to ignore the sensation of lightning on her skin at the contact. She momentarily forgot what she was doing and stared up at him. 

Bash cleared his throat. “I'm just going to take Dellie out to, uh, see the horses. You let me know when supper is ready.” Then she blinked and he and Dellie were already gone. 

Anne and Gilbert stayed quiet for a few more long moments before he came up to her side and spoke, choosing his words carefully. “I know… that you don’t want us here, but I couldn’t say no to Marilla when she asked, and it wouldn’t have felt right to leave you up here all alone.” He placed his hand on the table next to where hears was resting, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating off of it. 

“I know that. It just feels like Marilla still treats me like a child. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself, she should know that. I’ve been doing it for years before I came to green gables. I was often even responsible for multitudes of awful children as well.” He flinched at the mention of her old life in the orphanage. She hardly spoke of it, but he knew it was horrible for her. And now she mentioned her terrible experience in such a casual manner, it made his heart ache for her. 

“Marilla knows you're not a child, it’s just that you're her child and she needs to know that you are safe, even when she’s not here to protect you.”

“I know.”

“Besides, trouble does have a way of finding you.”

“Hey!” She swatted his chest with the back of her hand. “You're lucky I don’t have a slate nearby.” Her eyes traced over the little scar on his temple. It was pale against his tanned skin. Anne wondered when his teasing had gone from infuriating her, to making her laugh. 

His smile faded and his tone got serious again. “Anne, sometimes, you need to accept help, not for your sake,” his voice was barely a whisper, “But for the sake of those who care about you.” She gave him one more shy smile. 

“Okay,” she whispered back. Gilbert had a sudden urge to run away before he found himself accidentally admitting something that he definitely wasn’t ready to admit. 

“Um, I guess I’ll go ring the bell for Bash,” he said. 

“Oh… right.” She felt very confused by the pang of regret that their moment had not lasted any longer. He turned and walked away. He was almost at the door when she called after him, “Hey Gil?” He looked back over his shoulder. “Thank you.” He paused, then smiled and nodded, and slipped out the door. It was funny, but Anne thought that even though his lips were smiling, there was something sad in his eyes. 

***

Dinner passed peaceably enough. Dellie babbled away at the end of the table and it kept the three of them occupied. The awkwardness eventually faded when Anne and Gilbert got into a small, mostly nonsensical, squabble about what the biggest river in the world is that lasted long after they had all finished eating. 

“All I'm saying is that the Nile River is the longest, by far.”

“But longest isn't largest. A better qualifier would be the amount of water flow, which would be the Amazon river.” Anne argued back. 

“If you weren't so stuck on semantics, you would see that longest is largest, according to the most generally accepted measurement of rivers.” Gilbert could not actually care less about the longest, sorry, largest river, what he cared about was making Anne just mad enough that she got that steely look in her eyes and her cheeks flared red. One of these days it may get him smacked upside the head, again, but something told him it would be totally worth it for these moments when he had Anne's attention fully on him. 

Bash had to say Anne's name three times with increasing volume before he could break through the curtain between her and the rest of the world. 

“Sorry, yes?” He laughed when she was immediately back to all sweetness. 

“I think little Dellie is ready to be put to bed. You think you could show us to our room?”

“Right. Yes. Of course.” She looked around at the disaster of a kitchen her cooking had left behind. 

“I can get started on washing the dishes,” Gilbert offered. Anne gave him a small smile as she led Bash, with Dellie on his hip, to the stairs. 

“Marilla put the old spare crib in Matthew’s room, it's the biggest, so you and Dellie can both sleep in there. I'll have Gilbert sleep in the guest room. It's closest to my-- to the stairs.” 

“Thank you, Anne. Say thank you, Dellie.” Dellie burbled out a few syllables that were definitely not thank you. 

When Anne got back downstairs, Gilbert was at the sink with his sleeves rolled up over the elbow and his hands covered in soap bubbles. As she watched the way his forearms flexed and his fingers slid over the ceramic, she got a peculiar feeling in the base of her stomach. She immediately tried to convince herself that the feeling was just that she had a little too much to eat. 

When she snapped back to reality, she said in a voice a little closer to a whisper than she'd have liked, “I can dry.”

“Oh.” He seemed stared when he turned and saw her in the doorway. She wondered where his thoughts had been so intently that he hadn't heard her return. “You don't need to do that, I've got it. Besides, you cooked, it's only polite for me to handle the dishes.”

“You helped.” She worried that maybe she had said that too fast. “With the cooking, I mean.”

“Well then, if you insist.” 

Anne thought that maybe she was going crazy. After all, this was only Gilbert. Her longtime rival and now somehow her second-best friend. So why then, did sparks shoot into her fingers when they brushed his. And why did that knot in her stomach grow tighter when he smiled at her. There was something about the way that he washed each dish, taking his time to be thorough like he wanted to stretch this out as long as he had an excuse. It also seemed like his shoulder bumped hers more often than absolutely necessary. Gilbert, for his part, was really, really trying not to picture them doing dishes together in a house of their own. Okay, so maybe he was a little bit, totally and completely gone for her. 

When they were both entirely sure every last dish was cleaned and dried, Anne showed him to the guest room and accidentally blurted out in a very embarrassing manner, “My bedroom is just next door there, if you need anything.” Before she ran out of the room. She then proceeded to grab a book from on top of her dresser, a Jane Austen novel, and went back down to the sitting room, where Bash had been trying to practice his knitting. She tried to read, but every time he missed a stitch, she would have to set down her book and explain to him how to fix it. 

She was just telling Bash for the tenth time the difference between a knit and a purl and why yes, it did actually matter, when Gilbert walked into the room and she stopped breathing. He had removed his vest and the top button of his shirt was undone. Something about the little glimpse of the skin of his neck made her mouth suddenly and very confusingly start to water. And worst of all, his hair was tousled, like he had repeatedly run his fingers through it. Anne wanted nothing more than to touch those curls. Instead, she kept both hands firmly on the sides of her book. Even when he sat down next to her on the sofa. She tried for the millionth time that evening to focus on her task, the book in front of her. 

Her eyes darted over to the medical text in front of Gilbert. “What is that?” she asked before she could stop herself. 

“It's an anatomical drawing of the heart.” Subtle, Bash thought. 

“Really?” Anne abandoned all pretense and scooted closer to Gilbert and tucked her feet up to her side. He explained to her how all the valves and chambers worked. Almost an hour passed before Anne started making little yawns and her head was dangerously close to resting on his shoulder. “I think we should all get to bed,” Gilbert suggested, tenderly closing the book. He stood up and extended a hand to Anne to help pull her to her feet. The poor girl looked so tired he worried she wouldn't make it up the stairs. 

“You two go on ahead,” Bash said, “I think I really am close to figuring this out this time.” Gilbert desperately hoped Anne hadn't seen the wink Bash had shot him. They walked up the stairs shoulder to shoulder, then stopped and faced each other in the doorway. They just stared at each other for a minute, neither sure what to say. They were too close, Gilbert couldn't seem to get enough air into his lungs, and she kept gazing up at him, head tilted back. 

“Goodnight, Gil,” she mumbled. 

“Goodnight, Anne.” He trailed his fingertips down her arm, before slipping them in and then back out of her hand. She stepped back and gently shut the door. He stared at the spot she had been standing and realized that if there was ever an ideal time to kiss her, that was probably it. He walked back to his room alone. 

He tossed and turned for a while, and even when he finally fell asleep, it was a light and restless slumber. Which was why he was so easily awoken by a scream only a few hours later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at arts-and-allurements or my personal Tumblr: slytherins-slut


	2. Chapter 2

Gilbert was jolted awake, confused and disoriented, not recognizing the room he was in at first. He was jerked back to his senses by another scream. Anne. He was out of bed and in her room in seconds. She was in bed, thrashing and yelling ‘No… no, stop’ over and over. Her hair was strewn all over her pillow, pulled out of its braids and her quilt was pushed aside. She seemed to still be asleep. He sat down on the edge of her bed and put his hand on her arm, trying to rouse her. 

“Anne,” he tried to keep his voice calm. “Anne, you need to wake up. It's just a nightmare. Please wake up, Anne. It's okay, you're okay.” He lifted her into his arms, with her legs draped across his lap. She came to slowly, bawling, with her head on Gilbert's chest. He held her as she cried and stroked her hair to calm her. When she got her sobs mostly under control, she pulled back, lifting her face from where it was burrowed into the front of his shirt, and pressed her temple to his jaw.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” he muttered. He traced circles over her back with his fingertips and she leaned into him. 

“I don't know.” She didn’t know how to talk to him about things like this. It was always something she had dealt with alone. But there was something in the way that he was holding her that was already making things better. After a few minutes, her breathing steadied but hot tears continued rolling down her cheeks. She was still wrapped up in Gilbert’s arms. A little while later, she tried to speak again. 

“It was so horrendous, Gil. Like a sequence of the worst things imaginable. At first, I had to watch Matthew and Marilla die.” Her voice was shaky. “I was sent back to the orphanage because no one else wanted me. I had to relive all those years of... of torture. All the torment at the hands of those dreadful girls. Oh, Gil. It was so, so...” She couldn't finish her sentence. There weren't words. 

Gilbert was also finding that he didn't have words to comfort her as he would have liked. All that he could do was continue to run his fingers through her wild hair as he held her and whisper, “It's okay,” and hope that it was enough. 

Gradually, she stopped crying. “Thank you, Gilbert… I mean it,” she added to the end because she knew him well enough to know that he was about to brush it off and belittle the way that he came to her rescue. “Thank you for waking me, for listening, for everything.” Gilbert stopped the words ’I would do anything for you, Anne’ from escaping his throat. It really wasn't the opportune time for a romantic overture. He forced himself to unwrap his arms from around her. Her fingers clung to his shirt, already missing the contact. 

“I should let you try and get back to sleep,” he said, and he was about to stand up when Anne stopped him with a frantic hand wrapped around his wrist. 

“Wait!” She took a deep breath. “Would you-- Do you think maybe you could stay? I mean, could you hold me? Please? Just until I fall asleep?” She could hardly look him in the eye. 

He whispered a simple, “Yes” and watched as she laid down on her side, then grasped his arm to pull him down with her. He carefully laid next to her on the tiny bed, pulled her to him, and tried to ignore the feeling in his chest when she nuzzled into the crook of his neck. Her breath was hot, and her feet were cold where she slipped them between his. He drew her quilt up over the two of them. Gilbert listened as her breathing slowed and her muscles released their tension. He kept reminding himself that he was only staying until she was asleep, despite how much he wanted to stay forever. Just when he thought she had drifted off, he pressed a kiss to her temple, gently as to not wake her. After a moment of stillness, she slid her hand down his arm and intertwined her fingers with his. 

***

Early in the morning, just before dawn, Dellie started fussing. Bash knew from months of experience that the best way to soothe her was to walk around the house while carrying her. The light bouncing always seemed to lull her back to sleep. He swathed her in an extra blanket, to protect from the bit of a chill in the night. 

After pacing around his room about twenty times, he wandered out into the hall. Bash was surprised to see the two kids' doors were thrown wide open. Poking his head into the guest room, he found that Gilbert's bed was vacant. He was even more surprised that Anne's bed was occupied by not one, but two people. There they slept, wrapped up in each other, looking more content than either had in weeks. 

Not wanting to disturb them, Bash snuck him and (the thankfully dozing) Dellie back to his room, hoping the both of them could get another hour or two of sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I know that this is a very short chapter, but the next one is coming soon. 
> 
> Find me on Tumblr at arts-and-allurements, or on my personal Tumblr, slytherins-slut


	3. Chapter 3

Gilbert woke with the sun the next morning. He kept his eyes closed, basking in the light. he couldn't remember the last time he was that comfortable. His bed felt softer than usual and there was a strange, warm weight on top of him. He cracked one eye open and saw hair the color of flames. He wasn't home. He was in Anne's bed. She was sprawled out on top of him, legs tangled with his, hands resting on his chest. He knew he shouldn’t have been there, but she just looked so stunning with the sun streaming across her face and spilling over her curls. 

Then he noticed the state of their clothing. When he had run into the room in the middle of the night, he hadn’t stopped to worry about being presentable. He was only wearing a large shirt that was mostly undone and a pair of white shorts he normally wore under his pants. Anne was in a similar state of disarray, wearing only a delicate nightgown that didn’t even cover her knees and had a thin strap that had slipped off her shoulder. He was utterly mesmerized, he wanted to kiss every single freckle that covered the surface of her pale skin. 

She started to shift in his arms, burrowing deeper into him. “Good morning,” he mumbled, brushing her hair out of her face, “How did you sleep?”

“Much better... with you here.” She lifted her head and gazed up sleepily into his eyes. 

“We should get up, don't want to risk Bash finding out I slept in here.” He cursed himself. What a stupid thing to say, she was going to explode. Her eyes flashed with panic and she jumped up in horror into a seated position. Then it was Gilbert’s turn to panic because she was now sitting on her knees with one leg on either side of his waist. They both stared at each other in absolute fear before they scrambled out of the bed and to their feet. Gilbert took one last look at her. Cheeks flushed red and the sun behind her giving her a flaming halo. She was a goddess. He ran away. 

Gilbert slammed the door to the guest room behind him. He felt horrible. He had told Anne he would leave when she fell asleep, but he was just so caught up in making sure she was okay, and he was really so comfortable, but now she was panicking and he had maybe ruined the friendship it had taken them so long to build. But wasn't it her who had pulled him into her bed, and took his hand in her’s? He was so confused. He was starting to think that he maybe loved her, but it seemed like her feelings for him changed every ten minutes. He got dressed slowly, taking care to button up his shirt and vest all the way up. 

By the time he got down to the kitchen, Anne already had breakfast on the table and she and Bash were sitting across from each other with Delphine at Bash’s side. Which meant that the only seat open was next to Anne. He loitered at the base of the stairs; not sure he was ready to face her. Bash noticed him first, calling out, “Good morning, Blythe! You sleep good?” 

Gilbert stammered out a response that was mostly comprised of “Um, I...um...yes?” Anne's face turned a shade of red that rivaled her hair. 

“The bed in the guest room comfortable enough?” Bash kept pushing. Gilbert ignored him and sat at Anne’s side. At the lack of reaction, Bash dropped his teasing. Anne seemed calm enough, surprisingly, and spent the meal chatting with Bash about how Dellie was growing. Gilbert simply loved to watch her while she spoke. But every once in a while, her arm would graze against his and he thought he might die. Then they both reached for the butter dish at the same time and one of her fingers wrapped around his accidentally and she gave him a shy smile. He was done for. 

When breakfast was over, and the table cleared, Bash ushered him out the door to go and get their chores done on their own farm leaving Dellie with Anne for the day and promising to be back for lunch. 

***

Gilbert thought he was out of the woods with Bash, but once they were out of earshot of the house, Bash stepped in front of him and turned around to face him as he walked backwards down the path. His face hinted at playfulness, but his tone was entirely serious. 

“Gilbert, do I have any reason to doubt the honor of our dear Anne? Because I would very much like to not have to talk to Marilla about anything you two got up to.” It took him almost a minute of Bash’s questioning expression to realize he must have somehow seen him and Anne in bed the night before. 

“Oh God. Bash! No. She had a nightmare, I woke her up. All we did was talk... And sleep.”

“You talked? You finally tell her you're sweet on her?” 

“No, I didn't feel that the best time to tell a girl you have feelings for her was when she was already crying.”

“So you can admit it now? You love her? I win?” He looked so excited, but Gilbert couldn’t share the enthusiasm at the acceptance of his feelings. 

“Bash, stop. It’s clear she doesn’t feel the same.”

“You are denser than I thought if you can’t see that that girl adores you.”

“She only asked me to stay last night because she was upset about the nightmare, not because she likes me.” Of course she didn’t want him specifically to stay, she just needed comfort and he happened to be there. 

“She ask you to stay? She pull you into that bed? She wrap herself around you like that? That is beyond like, boy.”

“Maybe I thought so too at the time, but then she freaked out this morning.”

“Course she did. Anyone but me had found you, you’d be halfway to the church already.”

“I didn’t think about it that way.”

“I’m startin’ to worry you don’t think at all.” Bash tapped his head for emphasis. “You just need to talk to her, tell her how you feel, but tell her you aren’t rushin’ off to marry her.”

“I don’t know how to do that! What if she rejects me? What if I make things weird and destroy our friendship and she never speaks to me again?” He was spiraling and Bash had the gall to actually laugh in his face. 

“That won’t happen. What’s the alternative? You hide your feelings forever?”

“Yes.” Bash laughed again, before falling back into step at Gilbert’s side. They were silent the rest of the walk, but up in the Green Gables barn loft, Anne and Dellie were having a similar conversation, though much more one-sided. 

***

“I just don’t get it, Dellie, we keep having all these wonderful moments…in the kitchen, in my- my bed, last night. And I just can’t tell if he cares about me or he just cares in general because he is a good person.” Dellie cooed in her basket where Anne had propped her up on top of a pile of hay. Anne was pacing wildly in front of her.

“And do I even want him to care about me like that? How can I even be certain of how I feel for him? I mean, yes, he is always there for me, to help me and comfort me however I need. And he understands me like nobody else ever could. Yes, we were rivals…and I hated him, but lately, it is much more of a friendly competition, like we just want each other to be pushed to our best. God knows he challenges me to be better. Exactly Dellie, that’s what I mean. We’re our best selves when we’re together. So, why does he keep running away, why do I keep running away.” Delphine laughed, and Anne knew it wasn’t actually about what she was saying, but it sure did feel like it. “I don’t know what to do! If I try to talk to him about all this, I could ruin everything. Do I just do nothing, say nothing? Can’t we just keep going on like we are right now?”

Anne caught sight of Jerry in the yard through the loft window. She desperately hoped he hadn’t, he would tease her mercilessly for it. She watched Jerry as he walked down the path to the trees, seemingly done with his chores already. It must be past noon. Anne didn’t know where the morning had gone, she must have been up in the barn loft longer than she thought, it was already time to go begin preparing lunch, which also meant that it was almost time for Bash and Gilbert to be returning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr at arts-and-allurements or my personal Tumblr: slytherins-slut
> 
> I have the last two chapters planned out but I can't seem to get them on the page. Comments and kudos help a ton!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies,   
> You have all been so patient with me. I got very busy with school and work, but it means so much that you've stuck around. I worked really hard on this chapter because you all deserve the best! I hope you enjoy it. Don't worry the next chapter (our last one!) is coming soon!
> 
> P.S. All of your very sweet comments make me so happy and motivated to write more <3

Anne wasn’t in the mood to do any real cooking, so she set about to find something to reheat for them all. Despite only having the stove on for a few minutes, Anne felt like the room was too hot, like the air was too thick. She was rushing around, trying to get the table set and looking nice before they got back from morning chores. She grabbed Marilla's thin vase of flowers off the windowsill and placed them in the center of the table. She stopped for a second to curse herself for not taking the time to fix her braids before she started. Her hair was slipping out if it's ribbons. She figured the best way to deal with it now was to just untie them and let it go loose. She was combing her fingers through the loose curls when she remembered the pot on the stove and spun around to pull it off the heat. Then the door flew open. Being startled by the sudden return of Bash and Gilbert, Anne's fingers missed the handle of the pot and her knuckles hit the side instead. She shrieked in a combination of surprise and pain. 

“Anne!” she heard Gilbert call out and then he was at her side in seconds, “Are you alright? What happened? Are you hurt? Let me see!” She admired the way that he calmly and carefully looked over her fingers with his trained eye. Internally, Gilbert was trying not to panic at the sight of her raw flesh and was desperately hoping that it would not blister. 

“I’m okay, it's just a mild burn.” She was trying to convince herself as well as him but the burn on her knuckle was already beginning to sting and had turned a fierce shade of red against her pale skin. He took her hand in his, closely examining the mark. She was shaking. 

“Here, let's get that under some cool water.” He led her over to the basin with her small hand still tucked in his, “Bash, can you get the honey from the pantry?” Gilbert didn't even bother to turn around, just shouted it at him over this shoulder. Gilbert let go of her with one hand to grab the pitcher. He held her hand low in the basin and slowly poured the cool water over her knuckles. Anne’s pain was instantly relieved. Gilbert pulled his sleeve down over his hand and used a clean spot to blot the water off, but the second the cloth touched her, the ache came back. The fabric stuck to her raw flesh and pulled when he lifted his hand.

Anne was mesmerized by how easily he had slipped into the role of a competent healer and she was impressed by the steadiness of his voice and the softness of his care. She didn’t notice when, but Bash had placed the jar of honey on the counter next to them. Gilbert scooped some out and used the back of the spoon to spread it over her burnt skin. Once again, the pain faded away. She couldn’t help but gasp. 

Gilbert’s eyes darted up at the sound. Anne’s expression was somewhere between pain and relief, face flushed, and eyes watery. But what struck him hardest was the way that the midday sunlight was streaming through her glorious curls. Her hair was wild, once again out of its usual braids, and thrown all around her shoulders. It seemed, in the light, a softer red than he had ever seen it. The sight immediately brought his mind back to how she had looked that morning when they had woken up in bed together. It still felt like a dream to him, much too good to be true. He got lost for a moment in the memory. He couldn’t hardly form a single coherent thought in his head and had completely forgotten how to talk. He just kept staring at her like an idiot. 

Anne found herself in a similar state of shock. As the pain had dulled, she’d noticed that Gilbert’s hair was mussed, his brow was coated in a thin sheen of sweat, and half of his shirt buttons were undone, so she could see the beads of sweat as they rolled down his neck and over his chest. He must have been working very hard in the orchard that morning. And then there was the way he was looking at her. Eyes wide and glossy, jaw slack, and lips parted. It confused her, to be looked at in such a way, but she was too scared to think too hard on its meaning. 

Bash was still standing in the far corner of the room, wishing he were anywhere else in the world. The kids were just standing there staring at each other in the middle of the kitchen. He was starting to lose all hope that either of them would ever make a move. He had half a mind to sneak out the door and leave them to it, but that idea was interrupted by the grumbling of his own stomach. 

“Anne dear, are you okay?” Bash tried to break through their fixation on each other, worried she wouldn’t even hear him.

“What? Oh, um… yes, I believe so.” She did not break her gaze from the boy’s. He was baffled at how they could both be so clueless. 

“Why don’t you take a seat, girl? Gilbert and I can finish up getting lunch on the table.”

“Right, yes, of course,” Gilbert stuttered out, then walked backward, leading her over to the table. He sat down next to her but made no move to join Bash in the kitchen. He was still holding her hands, softly, as to not hurt her already injured knuckles. 

They could hear movement in the kitchen, Bash bustling about, gathering up lunch to bring it out for them all, but it didn’t shake either of them from their fog, that is not until Bash called out again, “I could use another set of hands in here, boy.” Gilbert shook his head and blinked, looked over his shoulder to the kitchen, before he quickly turned back, and in a moment’s thoughtlessness, lifted Anne’s delicate fingers up to his lips and just barely pressing the softest kiss to her knuckles, before dropping her hands like he had been the one burned and running into the kitchen.

He had no idea why he did that. It was stupid of him. So unbelievably stupid. Had he not just a few hours earlier resolved to do absolutely nothing about his feelings because he didn’t want to risk their friendship? And now here he was, doing stupid things and ruining it all anyway because he hadn’t been thinking straight. He’d been much too caught up in the feeling of her skin on his and his need to ensure that she was okay, that he hadn’t stopped to think about possible consequences for his actions. 

In the kitchen, Bash shot him one of his signature looks but dropped it when he saw that Gilbert was torturing himself enough already. 

***

Lunch was tolerable. He wouldn’t say it was quite awkward, just very quiet. Which was strange, considering the pace at which Anne’s tongue usually flew. But there she sat perfectly silent. With her cheeks red, her hands fidgeting in her lap, hardly ever looking up from her plate, and certainly never making eye contact with Gilbert, who had spent most the meal staring at her unwaveringly, his eyes wide and desperate. He was adamantly trying to convince himself that he wasn’t completely desperate for her attention, but the longer she ignored him, the more nauseous he felt. Unfortunately, he was also too scared to say anything because he could not venture to guess at what Anne was feeling. He had assumed she’d be mad, but she wasn’t yelling or hitting him. And she wasn’t smug because she hadn’t tossed her braid a single time. And she couldn’t be happy because she wasn’t giving him that sly smile that made her eyes flicker and his heart ache. She was just silent. 

They were driving Bash crazy. So, after lunch, he took over the clean-up and ushered them two out the door to go for a walk, practically throwing their jackets after them, citing the beautiful weather, saying it was too pretty to waste all day indoors. He ignored their pleas that the both of them had spent the morning outside. Hopefully, if he kept forcing them to spend time together, eventually they would work out all their mutually-overwhelming, yet still unspoken feelings. But mostly, he just needed some space from them mooning at each other all the time.

Which was how Anne and Gilbert found themselves walking shoulder to shoulder down the path with no idea where they were going.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, please check me out in other places, like tumblr: slytherins-slut and arts-and-allurements. I've also made a tiktok, if that's your vibe. its mostly me singing and telling dumb stories, visit me there at laurynmakay. 
> 
> As this beautiful story draws close to its end, I'm looking for more ideas. Feel free to comment or message me on tumblr with any prompts you have. I'll write for a million other fandoms outside of AWAE.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, welcome to the last chapter.   
> I almost didn't want it to be over, but I'm not sure how much more yearning we could all take.   
> There's less Bash in this chapter than previously, I'm sorry, I know y'all love him, but his work here is done. This was a fun journey we've been on and I am so appreciative of all the love yo have given me throughout.   
> Hope you enjoy!

It really was a lovely afternoon. The wind was rustling the leaves on the trees around them in a way that could only be described as musical. Which was a nice alternative to the silence because Anne was still not talking to him. Not for lack of trying though. He had tried asking her how her hand felt, but she just flicked her eyes up at him for a moment and said, “It’s okay,” before ducking her head back down to watch her feet as she stepped carefully on the path. Then he tried asking her what she thought of how the light fell through the branches, knowing that if he got her going on the right topic, she would get that dreamy look in her eyes and he could listen to her wax poetical for at least an hour. But all she said was, “It’s lovely.” He was getting frustrated, and a little anxious. Apparently, he had already destroyed their friendship with just about twenty-four hours of stupidity, accidentally sleeping the night in her bed, with her on top of him, and then just going ahead and kissing her hands without thinking. No wonder she was freaked out, he’d taken too many liberties. 

Anne was indeed freaking out. But not for any reason that Gilbert thought. Anne was freaking out because she was pretty sure that this weekend had been one long, magnificent dream. Not only did he save her from her nightmares, which led to her waking up in his arms that morning feeling the safest she ever had, he had also taken care of her again when she burned her hand. And then he had actually kissed her, well, technically he had kissed her knuckles, but it was incredible just the same. The feeling of his lips on her skin lingered longer than the pain from the burn. He was always so good to her, so tender, and gentle, almost loving. The weekend had been the most confusing experience she’d ever had. Gilbert made her feel so special, but he was such a good man she was sure that he would be that considerate to anyone that needed it. Maybe she was reading the whole situation the wrong way. She had no idea how to act around him and was so scared to say or do the wrong thing and ruin it all, so she just did nothing. 

The spring air was warm enough, but the breeze was cool. Anne was appreciative of the jacket that Bash had thrown at her on her way out, but her hands and cheeks were still a bit chilled, luckily her hair, still out of its braids, covered her ears enough to keep them warm. Every once and a while, Gilbert’s fingers would just barely brush against hers, as they walked with their arms at their sides, and every time they did, Anne had to pretend that it didn’t stop her breathing entirely. Gilbert, in a moment of either bravery or stupidity, waited for the next time their hands bumped into each other, and then he folded two of his fingers around her smaller ones. He waited, watching her out of the corner of his eye, expecting her to react in some way, maybe pull her hand away. But she just gave his hand a little squeeze. She didn’t even look up at him. 

Anne was… She felt… Anne didn’t know how to feel. Somewhere between euphoric and panicked and like she was going to melt into the very ground they were walking on. So, she decided to show no reaction at all, for fear that she would give the wrong one. They kept walking, shoulder to shoulder, hand in hand, silently, still not knowing where they were going. 

***

They found themselves stopped on the old bridge over the river. Anne liked to watch the way the water rippled around the legs of the bridge. And Gilbert liked to watch the way her eyes traced the shapes. This time, at least, Anne was aware of his watching. She could feel the warmth of his body radiating into her side where he stood, so close. She could tell that a moment was building, like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how. So, she turned to face him, nearly chest to chest. She looked up into his eyes fully for the first time since they had left Green Gables. They looked dark, troubled. It confused her more. She had thought they were having a nice time. Why would he be upset?

“Anne, I am so sorry if this is overstepping, but I need to say something.” His mouth was moving without his control. And he had no idea what he was about to say. Probably something that would get him slapped. He took her hands in his, purely for safety purposes. “I want to tell you that I… Well, I… and I didn’t intend… But I have to…” Great, now he was bumbling away like the idiot he is. But something about the way she was smiling up at him made him lose every brain cell he ever claimed to have. Anne moved slowly, uncurling her fingers from his, before trailing her fingertips up his arms, over his shoulders, and wrapping her arms around his neck. She pulled him down, closer to her, and kissed him. 

Gilbert nearly fell over in shock, but his arms instinctively wrapped around her waist to steady him. The kiss was firm, but not aggressive. It lasted for only a second or two, Gilbert’s eyes had just barely drifted shut when Anne suddenly jumped back out of his grasp. She turned to run but he stopped her with the hand that was resting on the small of her back. Anne froze, with both hands raised at her over her head where she had pulled them off his shoulders. They stared at each other for a long time. The kiss had surprised them both, and neither knew what to do now. Gilbert’s curls were messy, and Anne wanted nothing more than to run her fingers through them, but she was scared that any movement would shatter something delicate hanging in the air between them. 

He gawked at her, wide-eyed and aghast. And suddenly she knew right then: he loved her. And she loved him back. So why were they stuck? Anne’s body wouldn’t listen when she tried to move. All she could do was whisper, “Gil…”

Then all at once, his mouth was back on hers. His arms tightened around her and her hands fell to softly grasp the sides of his face. This time, their kiss was fervent. It felt to Anne like the entire world had fallen into place. She wasn’t scared that she would do something wrong. She thought she’d be scared. But it was just so easy to do this with him. She moved carefully, to pull him closer. She needed him closer. One of her lithe hands found its way into his hair while the other traced lines down his neck with her fingertips. He made a low sound, deep in his throat in response. He was kissing her like the only air he could breathe had to come from her lips. Like he needed her in order to survive. 

When their lips opened and their tongues met for the first time, Anne knew that no piece of fiction she had ever read could compare to really being loved, and in such a thorough way. At some point, while they had been kissing, he had pushed her back up against the railing of the bridge and the old wood pressed into her skin. It was all nearly overwhelming. She pulled back to catch her breath. Gilbert took one look at her messy hair and swollen red lips and had to kiss her one more time. This one was soft and lingering. He kept his arms around her, holding her tightly against him, even as their lips parted. 

“Anne, I have so much I want to tell you, but I don’t have the words to say it all. You're so much better at expressing yourself than I am.” She laughed. 

“I’m not certain I have the words either, but I can try. I suppose to start, I should tell you… I love you.” She interrupted herself laughing. It was just so easy to say, she didn’t know why she hadn’t said it sooner, hadn’t said it a million times. She tried to make herself be serious, but she couldn’t stop giggling. “I love you; I really do. I think I’ve loved you for a while now, but I was simply too stubborn to admit it, to myself even.” Gilbert was smiling so wide, he felt ridiculous. He had to hide his grin in the curve of Anne’s neck. 

“I love you too.” He mumbled into her hair. 

“Say it again.” She played with the curls on the back of his head with one hand and laughed as his breath tickled the spot where her neck met her shoulder. He pressed a single kiss there, before standing up straight and looking her directly in the eye. 

“I love you too. And I know that I always have. Ever since you yelled at me for the first time. Since you hit me over the head with your slate.”

“I’m sorry!” She was not sorry. He deserved it. 

“No, I mean it. I was just trying to get your attention. I’m always just trying to get your attention. You know, when I was away, in Trinidad, I thought about you constantly, and Bash was always teasing me about writing you love letters, and I insisted that they were not love letters, but of course, I… I wanted them to be. I wanted you to love me, and to miss me, and to beg me in your letters to come back home to Avonlea. Because I missed you so much… so much that it hurt sometimes. And when I did come back, I was so stupidly happy to see you again. I felt like I had a family again for the first time since I lost my father, all thanks to you, for making Bash and Mary feel so welcome. You really saved us, when we lost Mary. Saved me… from wanting to run. God, Anne… dearest, loveliest Anne. I love you so much.”

Gilbert was wrong, she couldn’t express herself in words any better than that. Maybe he had stuttered and maybe he had rambled, but it was still the best speech she had ever heard. She was honestly worried she might cry. And how else could Anne respond to such a magnificent speech but to kiss him squarely on the lips. Like he deserved to be kissed. Long and slow. She hoped the kiss conveyed just how much she loved him back. After a while, a long while, the kiss broke and they took a moment to just grin at each other dreamily. 

“I am going to assume that,” Gilbert said, “that kiss and the one before… and the one, no two, before that means that I have your permission to court you?” He seemed a little nervous all of the sudden. 

Anne reassured him by swatting at his chest with the back of her hand and saying, “Of course you do, you idiot.” When his shoulders released some tension and he laughed, she kept teasing. “I expect you to do a good job too. I expect to be brought flowers and treats and to be walked home every day. You don’t have to speak to my parents though, I am my own woman who can make her own decisions.” He was looking at her with the softest, most doe-eyed expression, and finally, this time, she knew exactly why. “Oh, and I expect you to always look at me just like this, and to kiss me every chance you get, and to tell me every day that you love me, because you know I’ll forget.” 

He kissed her once, softly, and whispered, “I love you.” Anne whispered it back and took a moment to just look up at him, still entirely wrapped up in his arms. When the moment ended, they looked around. 

“What do we do now?” Gilbert asked, taking a step back. 

“I guess we go home?” It felt so anticlimactical to just return to real life, after everything that had just happened. But wasn’t that the best part, to be able to live real life side by side with the person you love, no longer having to imagine elaborate scenarios where they could be together. 

“Yeah. Right. Home.” So, they set off hand in hand toward Green Gables. Neither of them were at all surprised to see Bash sitting on the porch steps, Dellie in her basket next to him. And they were even less surprised when upon seeing them together, holding and hands and smiling like idiots, he jumped up and danced, yelling, “I knew it!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, please check me out in other places, like tumblr: slytherins-slut and arts-and-allurements. I've also made a tiktok, if that's your vibe. Its mostly me singing and telling dumb stories, visit me there at laurynmakay.
> 
> Now that this story is over, I'm looking for more ideas. Feel free to comment or message me on tumblr with any prompts you have. I'll write for a million other fandoms outside of AWAE.


End file.
